On New Year's Eve

I slept the day through

My beloved Louis lost his father

I didn't see my dad

I learned of my younger brother's struggles

I still did not have Christmas presents for most of my loved ones

My sensitive teeth couldn't take the cold

I was coughing loudly

. . .

What a way to end the year.

Cloudwatching

Clouds fascinate me. I can spend hours just watching them move, change shape and finally disappear. I don't know why, but sometimes clouds make me want to weep from within. They're beautiful but they're temporary. Much like most precious things in our lives.

These pictures were taken October of 2007, a month before my most loved digicam was stolen. I was and am convinced that October boasts the best skies. Trust me, I've been watching the sky for a long, long time.

Lemon and my red streaks

I met up with Lemon and her Dad at Trinoma to do a last minute Christmas shopping. When I arrived at the department store, I felt weak discovering a lot of people decided to do their last minute shopping on the very last minute as well. Then from afar, I heard a high pitched voice calling out to me. It was Lemon. Amused, I asked her, "how did you find me so easily, with all the people shopping around?"

To which she sarcastically replied, "hello, mom! Your red hair?"

I was dumbfounded once more. I'm pretty sure she's only seven. Uhm... yeah.

Oh you've got to be kidding!!!

one long sigh

Once more I find my self in the middle of everything. My head says move on but my heart refuses to let go. When I joined this throng of money-making night dwellers, I told my self, I should not get attached emotionally. It's fast-paced and you lose and win friends by the dozen.

Now look at me. I'm still here. I decided to leave the company almost nine months ago. How many times after that did I consider leaving and not looking back? Friends, laughter, crushes, the adrenaline rush, side-projects - all of them are reasons why I stick by.

Needless to say, I am where I feel I am most loved and appreciated. And that is reason good enough for me to stay. It's so difficult to find a place where one can thrive, and I am most glad I did. So there, I let my self get attached, I loved, I grew emotionally dependent on individuals I barely know. Perfect recipe for a disastrous career, ain't it? But hey, that's what's making me happy right now. That's what's making me stay.

So here I am at another crossroad in my career in the customer service world. It's not easy being here and I wish I am somewhere else. I wish it didn't get so complicated. I wish I don't have to decide. I'm floating for a few more days, I guess, waiting for signs, watching for signals. For now I'll just nurse my broken heart and try to detach it from my processing brain. It's not so wise to decide when you're hurt. I might regret it. It's like all the pieces seem to fit but there's still something wrong with the big picture.

Coffee, anyone?

Red red red... I love RED!!!

on my hair, that is. heehee...

Eperformax, Lion King Musical (Video2)

Second of two parts. Again, it's kinna unkind to the ears but this video will give you the chills nonetheless.

To the actors who practiced and practiced,

To the props men who almost didn't sleep,

To the members of the management who got "auctioned" just so we'd have enough funds to sustain the overwhelming expenses,

To our teammates who believed -

We all deserve this moment of glory. Let's celebrate our little triumph with humility. I've never seen such level of unity from all walks of life in the corporate world. If we didn't win, that alone is handsome enough prize already.

Pero mas masaya pa rin kasi nanalo tayo. Hehehe!!!

And I'll say it again: WE REALLY REALLY ROCK!!!

Eperformax - The Lion King Musical (video 1)

First of two parts. We apologize for the poor quality of the audio. But we don't apologize for the screams and cheers of the crowd. Heehee... *wink*

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
WaMu has a special way of loving me.

Last week was one of the most eventful weeks of my life as a CSR. With our account enjoying a rollercoaster ride and the Christmas season inevitably approaching, I was caught right in the middle of everything. I honestly was considering leaving the company once more and moving on with another career path or just continue somewhere else. I don't know what part hormonal imbalance played this time, but I was simply exhausted. Needless to say, I was ready to give up.

I was actively involved in our musical production then. I was tapped to join the props committee and that's where the stress originated. With barely two weeks to accomplish so much and there's the unexpected lack of OTPs even with ten to 15 minutes of waiting time, I strongly believed we were overreaching. Have you seen The Lion King Musical on youtube? We were aiming for that. No shit.

With generous help from my CPO/CE teammates, we were able to deliver my assignments - 4 grass headdresses and four tree headdresses and hand pieces. Imagine creating each and every damned blade of grass out of walis tingting and green crepe paper, branches from mache'd paper sausages and leaves from wires and more green paper. Coke, CE's QA was my partner here and she worked like a machine! Without her I could've cried out of frustration. She made it possible, least to say.

Saturday morning, 36 hours before the big competition, I was applying finishing touches to my assignments. Delivered them to the props team, only to find out the animals were still ghostly white. There was so much to do in so little time. I decided, hey I could spend a few hours more helping out. A few hours turned into a day. I didn't go home from my Friday night shift until it was Sunday morning already. I was a zombie.

Blood, sweat and tears - literally. I was tearing up inside because I didn't wanna give up. Everybody was expecting so much from us. And it'll break their hearts to know that the props department screwed it up for them. No, no. Giving up was not an option.

I haven't seen such level of unity from all walks of life in the corporate world. Management people get down on their a$$ses and got dirty. My hands hurt from painting, twisting wires, cleaning, sticking paper and more cleaning. Our biometrics scanner already refused to read my fingerprints. Naubos na yata ang fingerprints ko. Nobody slept but no one got cranky, well at least not out loud. I appreciate the cheerfulness of these guys I was working with. It spelled the difference between giving up and hanging on.

Sunday morning came, everything was still a far cry from completion, but then we knew it was possible. I was able to go home. I hugged my Little Munster who was nagtatampo na at that time. I promised her she'd have all of me after the production. "Just give me one more day, babe," I told her.

Woke up late. Call time was 4PM, I woke up at 5. Without spare time to shop for a red-and-black get up, I recycled my old clothes. Screaming red Chinese blouse and generic black pants and leather boots. I reached A-Venue at 7PM, hoping against all hopes that I hadn't missed our own presentation yet.

First reaction was, wow... People did get dressed to kill tonight. I'm already dead so yeah. I didn't even apply make up, for all I care. I just wanted to go backstage and extend assistance to the presenters. Met with my CPO team then ran towards the actors. Lo and behold! It was the perfect eye-candy! I suddenly felt like playing veterinarian. Lionesses, gazelles, zebras, giraffes, birds, an elephant - I just died and went to wilderness heaven. I knew then we're going to give the crowd something to remember. Hopefully not something we're going to regret forever. Heh..

Of course the actors got so nervous. I scavenged for cigarettes, lighted them up and even placed them in their lips since they have stuff attached to their hands and arms. Ultimate yaya talaga, but I was having a good time. If there was a shortage of adrenaline everywhere else in the world that night, it's because we hoarded them by tons.

I was trying to catch a bite when it was announced that WaMu was about to perform. I dropped my fork and ran towards the back of the stage. I sent up a silent prayer, asking God to watch over us.

I was especially nervous because our actors never got to try the props and costumes. No dress rehearsal, whatsoever.

Darkness. Silence. Then came that familiar 'chant' from Circle of Life. Spotlight and smoke on Macky, who played Rafiki. I was stunned.

Macky delivered a standout performance as Rafiki. I know he's good but I didn't expect he's THAT GOOD. He won the crowd's attention, now it's the rest of the cast's turn to win their hearts. And they did.

Everything's a blur now to me but I'd never forget how I felt that night when I was watching them perform. I was crying so hard. I was sobbing. I covered my face in disbelief. I didn't expect the musical to look so damn good. When the zebras and the gazelles and the giraffes started moving around, I could no longer breathe. "Those were the ghostly white animals we were working on last night," I said to my self. We almost didn't have a presentation!

The elephant that walked towards the stage, followed by four lovely white birds deserved special mention too. I love it that our managers and supervisors were so 'game.'

Every now and then I'd snap out of the state of trance I was in to assist with costume changes. I was extra proud when the grass and tree men appeared on stage. Those grasses, those trees - they expected so little of them. It was a real ego booster to hear somebody from the crowd, a non-Wamu employee, blurt out "para dun pala yun. Ang galing!" I wanted to say, "kami gumawa nun eh, ganda no?" But I was afraid baka kuyugin ako. So I continued watching from the side of the stage in silent awe.

The actors - each and every one of them, deserved the cheers and the claps and the whistles from the crowd. They were so damn good up there! And it also helped that the lighting was great. Golds and greens and purples continue to flood the stage. It was the total package!

I know I've said it a lot of times before, but I'll say it again - STANDING OVATION, BABYYY!!!

Towards the finale, it also helped that we chose a grand song to end the presentation. As our Boss Wax sang "in the circle... The Circle of Life!," everybody was just screaming and cheering and clapping helplessly. Never mind that the party poppers didn't go off. We didn't need confetti anymore. It was the grandest, most extravagant moment of the night. It took a long time before the cheering died down. I have all the right to say, we won 'em hearts fair and square and we wouldn't let them go just yet.

I ran towards Ian G and hugged him real tight and cried some more. My body must've been experiencing hormonal breakdown already. From frustration to panic to surrender to extreme pride - my systems couldn't have handled them easily. One solution was to continue hugging and kissing everybody. I love this team! I didn't ever want this night to end.

As we impatiently waited for the announcements, we took pictures, drank beer, chatted and smoked. Then came the moment of truth. The 5th placer was called, then the 4th, then the 3rd. WaMu had not been called yet. We were jumping with excitement already. Then the host called us to the stage, along with the other team whose name had not been called out too.

I'll cut it short. WE WON!!! For the very first time, WaMu won the group competition. And because the big people were so impressed, they doubled our prize to 40K. We were ecstatic! But it doesn't stop there. Our 40K? It was doubled once more! We won 80K!!! Oh this night continued to rock my world!

More hugs and kisses and picture-taking later, we were nearing the end of the night. We took pictures of our props - the very same things we were frustrated about the night before - and bade farewell. The zebras and gazelles suffered broken limbs. There's not much we can do for them then. We left them backstage, with all due respect.

Off to our after-event party. Oh how I enjoyed our little victory celebration. I'm infatuated with the fact that suddenly, I have great new friends! We all ended up in a small hotel room right across A-Venue. I went home Monday morning.

So what did this experience teach me? A lot of things, that's for sure. I learned that willpower spells so much difference when you're trying to accomplish seemingly impossible tasks. That you'll earn friends by being helpful. That sense of humour is one of the greatest gifts on earth. And oh, most importantly - WE ROCK!!!

And when people ask me, "were you there on the stage?" I always answer, "I definitely was. See the headdresses and the costumes? I am part of those. I won't dream of being somewhere else."

Heehee... I love my life. Now that's modesty aside. *wink*

Of lions and grassmen - The Lion King Musical Experience

WaMu has a special way of loving me.

Last week was one of the most eventful weeks of my life as a CSR. With our account enjoying a rollercoaster ride and the Christmas season inevitably approaching, I was caught right in the middle of everything. I honestly was considering leaving the company once more and moving on with another career path or just continue somewhere else. I don't know what part hormonal imbalance played this time, but I was simply exhausted. Needless to say, I was ready to give up.

I was actively involved in our musical production then. I was tapped to join the props committee and that's where the stress originated. With barely two weeks to accomplish so much and there's the unexpected lack of OTPs even with ten to 15 minutes of waiting time, I strongly believed we were overreaching. Have you seen The Lion King Musical on youtube? We were aiming for that. No shit.

With generous help from my CPO/CE teammates, we were able to deliver my assignments - 4 grass headdresses and four tree headdresses and hand pieces. Imagine creating each and every damned blade of grass out of walis tingting and green crepe paper, branches from mache'd paper sausages and leaves from wires and more green paper. Coke, CE's QA was my partner here and she worked like a machine! Without her I could've cried out of frustration. She made it possible, least to say.

Saturday morning, 36 hours before the big competition, I was applying finishing touches to my assignments. Delivered them to the props team, only to find out the animals were still ghostly white. There was so much to do in so little time. I decided, hey I could spend a few hours more helping out. A few hours turned into a day. I didn't go home from my Friday night shift until it was Sunday morning already. I was a zombie.

Blood, sweat and tears - literally. I was tearing up inside because I didn't wanna give up. Everybody was expecting so much from us. And it'll break their hearts to know that the props department screwed it up for them. No, no. Giving up was not an option.

I haven't seen such level of unity from all walks of life in the corporate world. Management people get down on their a$$ses and got dirty. My hands hurt from painting, twisting wires,  cleaning, sticking paper and more cleaning. Our biometrics scanner already refused to read my fingerprints. Naubos na yata ang fingerprints ko. Nobody slept but no one got cranky, well at least not out loud. I appreciate the cheerfulness of these guys I was working with. It spelled the difference between giving up and hanging on.

Sunday morning came, everything was still a far cry from completion, but then we knew it was possible. I was able to go home. I hugged my Little Munster who was nagtatampo na at that time. I promised her she'd have all of me after the production. "Just give me one more day, babe," I told her.

Woke up late. Call time was 4PM, I woke up at 5. Without spare time to shop for a red-and-black get up, I recycled my old clothes. Screaming red Chinese blouse and generic black pants and leather boots. I reached A-Venue at 7PM, hoping against all hopes that I hadn't missed our own presentation yet.

First reaction was, wow... People did get dressed to kill tonight. I'm already dead so yeah. I didn't even apply make up, for all I care. I just wanted to go backstage and extend assistance to the presenters. Met with my CPO team then ran towards the actors. Lo and behold! It was the perfect eye-candy! I suddenly felt like playing veterinarian. Lionesses, gazelles, zebras, giraffes, birds, an elephant - I just died and went to wilderness heaven. I knew then we're going to give the crowd something to remember. Hopefully not something we're going to regret forever. Heh..

Of course the actors got so nervous. I scavenged for cigarettes, lighted them up and even placed them in their lips since they have stuff attached to their hands and arms. Ultimate yaya talaga, but I was having a good time. If there was a shortage of adrenaline everywhere else in the world that night, it's because we hoarded them by tons.

I was trying to catch a bite when it was announced that WaMu was about to perform. I dropped my fork and ran towards the back of the stage. I sent up a silent prayer, asking God to watch over us.

I was especially nervous because our actors never got to try the props and costumes. No dress rehearsal, whatsoever.

Darkness. Silence. Then came that familiar 'chant' from Circle of Life. Spotlight and smoke on Macky, who played Rafiki. I was stunned.

Macky delivered a standout performance as Rafiki. I know he's good but I didn't expect he's THAT GOOD. He won the crowd's attention, now it's the rest of the cast's turn to win their hearts. And they did.

Everything's a blur now to me but I'd never forget how I felt that night when I was watching them perform. I was crying so hard. I was sobbing. I covered my face in disbelief. I didn't expect the musical to look so damn good. When the zebras and the gazelles and the giraffes started moving around, I could no longer breathe. "Those were the ghostly white animals we were working on last night," I said to my self. We almost didn't have a presentation!

The elephant that walked towards the stage, followed by four lovely white birds deserved special mention too. I love it that our managers and supervisors were so 'game.'

Every now and then I'd snap out of the state of trance I was in to assist with costume changes. I was extra proud when the grass and tree men appeared on stage. Those grasses, those trees - they expected so little of them. It was a real ego booster to hear somebody from the crowd, a non-Wamu employee, blurt out "para dun pala yun. Ang galing!" I wanted to say, "kami gumawa nun eh, ganda no?" But I was afraid baka kuyugin ako. So I continued watching from the side of the stage in silent awe.

The actors - each and every one of them, deserved the cheers and the claps and the whistles from the crowd. They were so damn good up there! And it also helped that the lighting was great. Golds and greens and purples continue to flood the stage. It was the total package!

I know I've said it a lot of times before, but I'll say it again - STANDING OVATION, BABYYY!!!

Towards the finale, it also helped that we chose a grand song to end the presentation. As our Boss Wax sang "in the circle... The Circle of Life!," everybody was just screaming and cheering and clapping helplessly. Never mind that the party poppers didn't go off. We didn't need confetti anymore. It was the grandest, most extravagant moment of the night. It took a long time before the cheering died down. I have all the right to say, we won 'em hearts fair and square and we wouldn't let them go just yet.

I ran towards Ian G and hugged him real tight and cried some more. My body must've been experiencing hormonal breakdown already. From frustration to panic to surrender to extreme pride - my systems couldn't have handled them easily. One solution was to continue hugging and kissing everybody. I love this team! I didn't ever want this night to end.

As we impatiently waited for the announcements, we took pictures, drank beer, chatted and smoked. Then came the moment of truth. The 5th placer was called, then the 4th, then the 3rd. WaMu had not been called yet. We were jumping with excitement already. Then the host called us to the stage, along with the other team whose name had not been called out too.

I'll cut it short. WE WON!!! For the very first time, WaMu won the group competition. And because the big people were so impressed, they doubled our prize to 40K. We were ecstatic! But it doesn't stop there. Our 40K? It was doubled once more! We won 80K!!! Oh this night continued to rock my world!

More hugs and kisses and picture-taking later, we were nearing the end of the night. We took pictures of our props - the very same things we were frustrated about the night before - and bade farewell. The zebras and gazelles suffered broken limbs. There's not much we can do for them then. We left them backstage, with all due respect.

Off to our after-event party. Oh how I enjoyed our little victory celebration. I'm infatuated with the fact that suddenly, I have great new friends! We all ended up in a small hotel room right across A-Venue. I went home Monday morning.

So what did this experience teach me? A lot of things, that's for sure. I learned that willpower spells so much difference when you're trying to accomplish seemingly impossible tasks. That you'll earn friends by being helpful. That sense of humour is one of the greatest gifts on earth. And oh, most importantly - WE ROCK!!!

And when people ask me, "were you there on the stage?" I always answer, "I definitely was. See the headdresses and the costumes? I am part of those. I won't dream of being anywhere else."

Heehee... I love my life. Now that's modesty aside. *wink*

Lemon, on my Anne Rice obsession

I was downloading audiobooks one weekend. I was checking the quality of my downloads and ended up listening to Body Thief for about 30 minutes. overheard:

Lemon: wala na talaga 'tong si Mommy. Addict na.



Toinks! I just had to laugh.

ePerformax' Rockin' Red-and-Black Ball and WaMu's The Lion King Musical

One of the bestest and most memorable nights of my life. Our account presented The Lion King Musical and went home as champions of the competition. Needless to say, WE ROCKED THE HALL!!!

STANDING OVATION, BABY!!!

I love my CPO and CE team for helping me complete my assignments (bushes and trees). I love the props team for staying cool under pressure, when all I wanted to do was panic and just give up. And I love the cast for just bringing the house down. *squeeeeee*

Will blog on this later. My eyes haven't been bleeding long enough so I'll go look at the pictures some more.

Pics from the following Multiply pages:

http://badongkamote.multiply.com/photos/album/14/lion_king_wamu

http://jemai00.multiply.com/photos/album/237/EperF_XMas_Party

http://celsmaca.multiply.com/photos/album/26/ePERFORMAX_red_and_black_party

http://sweetdaydream4.multiply.com/photos/album/1/ePerformax_x-mas_party

baby girl's friendster acct: http://profiles.friendster.com/45112503


Will wait for more uploads and then shamelessly steal and repost them. Thanks, you guys!

Vampires' Day Out

Previously, on My Life...

Louis and I were reunited after a year-and-a-half of silent separation. Louis invited us to his beach condo in Batangas to bond and celebrate almost 5 years of friendship and love.

* * * * * *

Dizzy from a hangover (it was Girls Night Out the night before we left), I almost got lost going to ATC that Saturday morning. I got so dependent on driving that I forgot how to commute. Side-story: I'm on a driving hiatus up to end of this year. Louis patiently stayed with me on the phone to guide me step by step. I went on and on and on til Louis cried out, look to your left, I'm here. Ah! The first beautiful sight of the day - My Louis, there on the sife of the road, proudly showing off the ink work on his arm, handsome as ever. I've never felt so relieved to see him. We hugged and I thought, I'm glad we're okay now.

Endless chat on our way to Nasugbu. Louis and Nii would talk about anime while I listen closely. I haven't been watching because I'd rather sleep or read something or talk to friends. Every now and then they'd lose my attention. One time I saw an aratiles tree. Memories of how as a child I would climb this huge tree in our neighborhood and just shamelessly pick all the really plump ones, degree of ripeness notwithstanding, swept me away. Louis and Nii said I have undiagnosed ADHD. Duh. Heehee... So there. We also talked about religion, Twilight, Amadeo (more commonly known as The Vampire Armand), tattoos, bad vices, Tuguegarao and Zac Efron. I was crashing from lack of rest, but they're much too excited to let me fall asleep. We arrived at the condo around two hours after we left ATC. Louis drove slow intentionally.

The place took my breath away. The condo was well kept and I say the taste for colors and fixtures is expesive. The room let out a rather welcoming vibe that made me wanna snuggle under the blanket and let time fly. But then again, THEY won't let me. Hehe... Masyado akong kinilig so I went to Louis and gave him a sweet sweet hug and a beso.

We went back out to have lunch at Jollibee. Me: We went all the way to Nasugbu to eat at Jollibee!!! Louis, his appetite was something else. I won't describe in detail but I remember him admitting it and calling himself, patay-gutom. Haha... We bought stuff and headed home. The STUFF included an underwear in nude from Louis. Just so I'd swim. *nyeh nyeh*

I took a nap for half an hour and woke up feeling a little better. We headed for the beach. Oh and the beach - it was really beautiful! There's also a nearby pool which was equally breathtaking. Louis and Nii jumped in while I remained on the shore. The magic of the place is enough to make me happy inside. And besides, someone had to look after the little precious (gadgets). *excuses*

We went back to the condo to wait for Emyr. When he arrived, he brought us beer. Lots and lots of beer. Arnii and I kinna thought of the same thing. Our thought bubble read: How the hell could we ever finish a case of Red Horse Mucho and be sober enough to get our a$$es home? Louis couldn't help, since he's pretty much intolerant to alcohol. Him and Nii quit smoking too. Nii - well she's an animal when gets drunk. Wild woman! Hehehe... On the otherhand, I tend to get super sleepy so I mixed me horse with extra joss. A kick and a punch. Saan ka pa?

We talked about more random stuff and really personal ones. We played "I have never" and came up with our own version. I realized so many things while playing: That it was freaky that I haven't tried anything stronger than smokes, that I haven't tried using drugs, that they thought I was sexually conservative (HAH!!!), that I know my Louis most of all, and that he remembered the thing he made me promise years ago. I was tearing up inside. I love this group. I love my Louis. I don't wanna lose them again.

I almost cried at the setting sun. I knew the day is ending and the adventure would soon be over. I've never been a big fan of sunsets. Never. They do look good but they make me well up in my heart.

No more nightswimming for us because we couldn't drag half-dead Arnii anymore. Emyr too wanted to take a nap. Louis and I had a short bonding moment on the couch while waiting for Emyr to wake up and Nii to finish her bath. We planned to have another Canyon Cove gathering in time for my birthday in February. I remember Louis saying, "let's do something special for this girl." *sniff*

Dinner at Dencio's, Tagaytay. It was awfully cold, di na sya nakakatuwa! We met up with Emyr's mom, who generously paid for the dinner. More stories on our way back to Alabang. Nii passed out already while Louis and I were sharing scary stories.

Alas, it was time to let go once more. I kissed Louis' cheeks before I jumped out of his car. I will surely miss him. And Nii - she still feels sick and had to hurry home. Ako naman, I had to go to my teammate's briday shower. Ding, ang bato! Hayy...

One pleasant surprise: Louis, he's childlike that day. I never saw him that relaxed before. Was it my fault that our gathering were always so serious? Maybe. But we're not 'just vampires' anymore. Not for a very long time.

I love you, all three of you. I hope that we'll be together when the sun finally sets on me. I can't wait for February. I'll cook the best darn Adobo and White Caldereta you'll ever have. Til next time. All my love!

Pictures here: http://forsaketh.multiply.com/photos/album/184/Daywalkers_Reunited
courtesy of our Claudia and Louis.

"Hummer" Smashing Pumpkins cover

*speechless*

All Star Beatles Tribute 2.8.04 Grammy's

A tribute to the group who revolutionized rock and roll music as we know it.

"Everybody likes music. Who didn't like music. They're stupid if they don't. That's right, I said they're stupid, they're not watching."

Random Pics from my sister's folders

Ayan, nangalikot ng files ng may files. hehe... I can't even remember when and where some of these were taken. Bahala na. haha..

A picture storybook of my MOSTEST FAVORITEST movie of all time.

And sit together, now and forever
For it is plain as anyone can see
We're simply meant to be

Don't you just hate it when I'm on Fangirl mode?

Vincent Perez

I think he's super sexy, even with the receding hairline. He became his roles. Even with Queen of the Damned, he became Marius, though not physically. Vincent Perez is LOVE!!!

Tsk tsk... it must be the time of the month.

Fan Girl Alert: I'm having an Elijah Wood moment so please bear with me.

I first saw him when my dad brought home a copy of The Good Son. That sad sad movie remains to be one of my most fave up to this day.

Too bad he didn't really "grow" up huh? Heehee. He's still uber lovable to me.

Miao, pa-order ng timba ulet.

Lemon, on the color PINK

Lemon and I were on our way to her school. Earlier we already had an argument on why she can't wear mommy's accessories to school. We saw this girl wearing baby pink shirt, Magenta pants, pink shoes and even had pink ribbons on her hair. Lemon goes...

"Mom, I don't like pink any more. Parang baduy na. Nung baby pa ko I love pink pero ngayon ang gusto ko na lang lahat BLACK and GRAY."

I really doubt that she's only seven. And I'm her mom!

Billy Corgan will always be one of the greatest poets of my life

Just a few of the lines from my favorite Pumpkins songs.



The World is a Vampire.
BULLET WITH BUTTERFLY WINGS



Today is the greatest
Day I've never known
Can't wait for tomorrow
I might not have that long
TODAY



Intoxicated with the madness, I'm in love with my sadness
ZERO



In you I see dirty
In you I count stars
In you I feel so pretty
In you I taste god
In you I feel so hungry
In you I crash cars
We must never be apart
AVA ADORE



Mother weep the years I'm missing
All our time can't be given back

No more promise no more sorrow
No longer will I follow
Can anybody hear me
I just want to be me
MAYONNAISE



I know I'll make it, love can last forever

I've journeyed here and there and back again
But in the same old haunts I still find my friends
Mysteries not ready to reveal
Sympathies I'm ready to return
THIRTY-THREE



Wrapped my hurt in you
And took my shelter in that pain
SOMA



I can't go on, digging roses from you grave
to linger on, beyond the beyond
BEHOLD! THE NIGHTMARE



who am I to need you now
to ask you why to tell you no
to deserve your love and sympathy
you were never meant to belong to me
CRESTFALLEN



And rescue me from me, and all that I believe
I won't deny the pain
I won't deny the change
And should I fall from grace here with you
Will you leave me too?
GALAPOGOS



And in your sad machines
You'll forever stay
Desperate and displeased - with whoever you are
And you're a star

The useless drags, the empty days
The lonely towers of long mistakes
To forgotten faces and faded loves
Sitting still was never enough
HERE IS NO WHY



I need someone to ease my mind
But sometimes a someone is so hard to find

Suffer my desire for you
IN THE ARMS OF SLEEP



Welcome to nowhere fast
Nothing here ever lasts
Nothing but memories of what never was
JELLYBELLY



who belongs
who decides who's crazy
who rights wrongs
where others cling
LUNA



As all things must surely have to end
And great loves will one day have to part
I know that I am meant for this world

My life has been extraordinary
Blessed and cursed and won

And the world so hard to understand
Is the world you can't live without
And I knew the silence of the world
MUZZLE



As far as you take me, that's where I believe
The realm of soft delusions, floating on the leaves

The steam of my misfortunes
Has given me the power to be afraid
PORCELINA OF THE VAST OCEANS

Talamasca Reunion

Start:	Nov 28, '08 06:00a
End:	Nov 29, '08
Location:	Louis' beach condo in Batangas

Four local Ricean vampires will spend 24 glorious hours together, watching their first sunrise in a long long time.

Tagged by Keptin K - and I'm tagging you!

Two names you go by: 
1. Nyl

2. Lynn

Two things you are wearing right now:
1. same BEER shirt i wore last night at BSM
2. Jeans

Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. win the pasta cook-off
2. a tight hug from my little munster who's still in school

Two people who will most likely send this back:
1. Freakna
2. Nii

Two things you did last night:
1. Got drunk in more ways than one

2.  Met up with friends who continue to rock my world

Two things you ate today:
1.  My Nanay's Karekare

2.  Korean instant noodles
 
Two People you just spoke with today:
1.  Keptin K, over text messaging

2.  Erick G, who's making me a lot more guilty for getting drunk this weekend of all time

Two things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Starting on my part at our account's musical production (as the propsmaker lang, hello! haha)
2. Paying bills
 
Two longest road trips:
1. QC to Candelaria, Zambales
2. QC to Alaminos Pangasinan
  
Two favorite beverages:
1. Coffee

2.  Four seasons juice

Music and Me

I was born in a family whose livelihood was built on music. My dad and his siblings were either folk singers or band members here and abroad. My cousins from both sides can carry a tune. It was no surprise that when I turned 12, I asked dad if I could have his old 12-string guitar. Now this guitar was way older than I am. He bought it when he was in Japan. I call it the Japayuki Yamaki.

It wasn't very easy learning to play the guitar. I had to take down the six other strings of Yamaki because dad said I had to learn the basics first. I didn't want to ask help from him. I was a rebel and I wanted to learn on my own. With the help of a Jingle chordchart, I inched my way into stardom. Well not really, hehe... First song I ever learned to play was The Beatles' Elenor Rigby. My mom would laugh at how I sucked at strumming.

I never really was a serious guitar player. I played at drinking sessions most of the time. Back then my brain wasn't too crowded yet that I was able to memorize song after song after song. I also learned to play lead a little. But real life got in the way. My life as a striving student was my priority.

So now I still know how to play but I admit I need tabs or chords to finish a song. Most of the time I am content with listening to the most rockin' songs, letting out a sigh, and thinking, sana pala tinuloy ko na lang.

People say I have an old rock and rollin' soul. I say I was born in the 50's, died in the 70's and got reincarnated in the 80's. I remember one stormy day at the office, after my usual night shift, a bunch of older guys were "jamming" in our office pantry. They were playing Don Mclean, Elton John, John Denver and the likes. I just sat there with them like I was a close friend and said, "malakas pa ulan eh, pwede makisali?" Instantly I had four new friends. They were surprised that I know the lyrics better than they do. Try singing American Pie and Country Roads Take Me Home from start to finish. And oh, add Skyline Pigeon and you basically have a picture of what went on that cold morning.

And I admit I love going to Bloomfields events. Throw in Area One in a big heap and I'm all set. The Beatles, Beach Boys, Jerry Lee Lewis, The Zombies - ah, guilty pleasure!

Since I was still a pink slob of flesh with a mouth in the 80's, the hand-me-downs from older cousins and friends introduced me to The Third Wave. I loved The Cure and a bunch of one-hit-wonders instantly. This was what we fondly call The Bagets Era. Cute pa si Niño Muhlach nun. Thanks also to a group of "New-Waver" friends in highschool, I never got away from the Europeans' slice of pop music.

My own adventures lead me to discover The Youth, Yano, Eraserheads, Rivermaya, Razorback and Wolfgang in the early 90's. I was heavily into Pinoy Underground music also and I was a frequent listener of LA Rock. My dad thought that he had created a monster. He wasn't all wrong.

Then came the teenage angst. Rock music got me through it. Billy Corgan was my ultimate hero. His poetry made me tear up inside. I turned into a Rock and Roll Encyclopedia then, always updated with the last releases, saving my lunch money to buy cassette tapes and a Walkman. I got into a 24/7 Alternative Rock music craze, with the help of NU107. Name it, I can play/sing it. Maybe not very well but still...

So now here I am shuffling songs in my iPod while typing away this nonsense essay. U2 followed by RHCP and then Gin Blossoms and then Incubus and then David Cook and then Danny Elfman and then Breathe and then Splender and then Jars of Clay and then America, and then DC Talk and then Korn and then Fuel... I guess you get the picture. There isn't a pattern.

One thing is clear though. There isn't an RnB/HipHop song in my playlist. Never has and never will be.

My recent visit to BigSkyMind made me realize once more that I'm the ultimate music whore. From Don Mclean to Robert Smith to Guns and Roses to The Smashing Pumpkins to Toad the Wet Sprocket to Live to The Killers - I sang every damn song! I still can't believe I missed Rockeoke night with my favorite geeks!

Your thoughts and violent reactions are most welcome.

Amusing Plurks 11.12.08

Cuz they're just too good not to share



PLURK:
Immoral Fibre says: I love being anti-Kepten Keren, like the anti-Cosmo of Cosmo. Heehee... EVIL IS FUN!

Thistle says

Bad bad kitteh!

The Spy-rate says I shall arm myself with magic flyswatters! And holy water!

The Spy-rate says bad bad kitteh nga...Vampirate laughs and laughs when there is ka-demonyohan in her paligid!!!

The Spy-rate says bad bad vampirate!

The Spy-rate says what do you call those pre Christmas dawn masses?

Immoral Fibre says MUAHAHAHAHA!!! while Miss Moral Fiber here swats 'em flies away I laugh and laugh and laugh. SO MUCH FUN!!!

Immoral Fibre says Simbang-Gabi?

The Spy-rate says yun...Lynn...lahat kayong mga demonyo dadalhin ko sa simbang gabi...yun.

The Spy-rate says habang nangungumpisal kayo kakain ako ng ensaymada.

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate:

Immoral Fibre says sawsaw mo pa sa chocolate.

The Spy-rate says oo naman, kase mukhang long wait ako while you guys are confessing...baka tanghali na kayo matapos...

The Spy-rate says hayaan mo, I'll re-read Lord of the Rings while waiting...

Immoral Fibre says teka teka... sino bang mga kasama ko? pwede ba muna kaming magkape bago mangumpisal

The Spy-rate says LAHAT kayo. Ako lang ang exempted.

The Spy-rate says ok lang yung kape huwag lang alcohol before confession. No-no din yung blood.

Immoral Fibre says

ai corny walang alcohol. ang tanging pag-asa ko na lang ay yung alak ni Father. yeyeye!!!

PLURK:
Immoral Fibre is experimenting on HATING MEN just for a day. FAIL!

The Spy-rate says

how can you even do that when Johnny Depp and Viggo Mortensen and Daniel Craig exist?

Dr. Ron says Immoral Fibre: told ya!

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate: hahaha... wala lang. just a challenge. pero di ko kinaya, sis. Some men are just too lovely!

Immoral Fibre says Dr. Ron: i don't know what came over me!

Thistle says Sure ka "men"?

Immoral Fibresays Thistle: at least biologically. haha...

The Spy-rate says sigh...some are lovely and some are absolutely BRILLIANT at their craft and lead incredible lives. You just have to love them.

Thistle says

The Spy-rate says I think it's not a matter of hating men or women but I guess hating the men who give men a bad name and women who give our gender a bad name

Thistle says Kinda reminds of of a Bon Jovi song.... Pero ibang lyrics hehehehe

Dr. Ron says The Spy-rate: aye concurrrr!

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate: couldn't have said it better.

The Spy-rate says I feel the love mga pare...

Immoral Fibre says

hahahaha... i'm trying not to ruin the moment nga ehhh!

PLURK:
Immoral Fibre is now a MAN-HATER!

Immoral Fibre says

joke lang.

The Spy-rate says and I'm a MAD HATTER.

The Spy-rate says I grew up with 7 of them ... I used to get teased all the time.

The Spy-rate says I hope my son turns out to be like my cousin Marcial who became a fireman in Monterey--handsome, helpful and wise.

Dr. Ron says Immoral Fibre: ikaw pa!

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate: hahaha... yeah you're mad!

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate: i grew up with male cousins too. but some of them turned gay. so...

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate: Firemen in the American movies look too sexy to be true. Looooove!!!!

Immoral Fibre says Dr. Ron: at baket?!? di ba ko pwede maging man-hater huh???

Thistle says Baklaaaaah!!!!!

Dr. Ron says Immoral Fibre: nope. You have too much love to give to confine it to women only.

The Spy-rate says take it from Dr. Ron.

The Spy-rate says doctor knows best.

Immoral Fibre says Thistle: hahahaha... is it that obvious?

Immoral Fibre says Dr. Ron: and who told you that IF I give up on men I'd confine my love (or lust) to wimin?

Immoral Fibre says The Spy-rate: hahaha... So he's Doctor Phil now? or Margie Holmes?

Dr. Ron says Immoral Fibre: ooh bestiality!

Immoral Fibre says Dr. Ron: wut? hahaha... iba yata naisip ko ah. or baka tama naiisip ko! BASTOS!!!

Dr. Ron says Immoral Fibre: who, you or me?

The Spy-rate says ayan, iba na yung usapan if its between Ron and Lynn eh

Dr. Ron says

Immoral Fibre says

These make me weep

TNBC Merch I can't get my hands on. So Sandy Claws, if you're listening (or in this case, reading), I promise to be nice next year. Heehee...

The Nightmare Before Christmas Poem by Tim Burton

Got this from BK's site: http://infinitedaydream.multiply.com/journal/item/135/The_Nightmare_Before_Christmas_by_Tim_Burton

The Nightmare Before Christmas
original poem by Tim Burton

It was late one fall in Halloweenland,
and the air had quite a chill.
Against the moon a skeleton sat,
alone upon a hill.
He was tall and thin with a bat bow tie;
Jack Skellington was his name.
He was tired and bored in Halloweenland,
everything was always the same.

"I'm sick of the scaring, the terror, the fright.
I'm tired of being something that goes bump in the night.
I'm bored with leering my horrible glances,
And my feet hurt from dancing those skeleton dances.
I don't like graveyards, and I need something new.
There must be more to life than just yelling,
'Boo!'"

Then out from a grave, with a curl and a twist,
Came a whimpering, whining, spectral mist.
It was a little ghost dog, with a faint little bark,
And a jack-o'-lantern nose that glowed in the dark.
It was Jack's dog, Zero, the best friend he had,
But Jack hardly noticed, which made Zero sad.

All that night and through the next day,
Jack wandered and walked.
He was filled with dismay.
Then deep in the forest, just before night,
Jack came upon an amazing sight.
Not twenty feet from the spot where he stood
Were three massive doorways carved in wood.
He stood before them, completely in awe,
His gaze transfixed by one special door.
Entranced and excited, with a slight sense of worry,
Jack opened the door to a white, windy flurry.

Jack didn't know it, but he'd fallen down
In the middle of a place called Christmas Town!
Immersed in the light, Jack was no longer haunted.
He had finally found the feeling he wanted.
And so that his friends wouldn't think him a liar,
He took the present filled stockings that hung by the fire.
He took candy and toys that were stacked on the shelves
And a picture of Santa with all of his elves.
He took lights and ornaments and the star from the tree,
And from the Christmas Town sign, he took the big letter C.

He picked up everything that sparkled or glowed.
He even picked up a handful of snow.
He grabbed it all, and without being seen,
He took it all back to Halloween.

Back in Halloween a group of Jack's peers
Stared in amazement at his Christmas souvenires.
For this wondrous vision none were prepared.
Most were excited, though a few were quite scared!

For the next few days, while it lightninged and thundered,
Jack sat alone and obsessively wondered.
"Why is it they get to spread laughter and cheer
While we stalk the graveyards, spreading panic and fear?
Well, I could be Santa, and I could spread cheer!
Why does he get to do it year after year?"
Outraged by injustice, Jack thought and he thought.
Then he got an idea. "Yes. . .yes. . .why not!"

In Christmas Town, Santa was making some toys
When through the din he heard a soft noise.
He answered the door, and to his surprise,
He saw weird little creatures in strange disguise.
They were altogether ugly and rather petite.
As they opened their sacks, they yelled, "Trick or treat!"
Then a confused Santa was shoved into a sack
And taken to Halloween to see mastermind Jack.

In Halloween everyone gathered once more,
For they'd never seen a Santa before
And as they cautiously gazed at this strange old man,
Jack related to Santa his masterful plan:
"My dear Mr. Claus, I think it's a crime
That you've got to be Santa all of the time!
But now I will give presents, and I will spread cheer.
We're changing places I'm Santa this year.
It is I who will say Merry Christmas to you!
So you may lie in my coffin, creak doors, and yell, 'Boo!'
And please, Mr. Claus, don't think ill of my plan.
For I'll do the best Santa job that I can."

And though Jack and his friends thought they'd do a good job,
Their idea of Christmas was still quite macabre.
They were packed up and ready on Christmas Eve day
When Jack hitched his reindeer to his sleek coffin sleigh,
But on Christmas Eve as they were about to begin,
A Halloween fog slowly rolled in.
Jack said, "We can't leave; this fog's just too thick.
There will be no Christmas, and I can't be St. Nick."
Then a small glowing light pierced through the fog.
What could it be?. . .It was Zero, Jack's dog!

Jack said, "Zero, with your nose so bright,
Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?"

And to be so needed was Zero's great dream,
So he joyously flew to the head of the team.
And as the skeletal sleigh started its ghostly flight,
Jack cackled, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

'Twas the nightmare before Christmas, and all though the house,
Not a creature was peaceful, not even a mouse.
The stockings all hung by the chimney with care,
When opened that morning would cause quite a scare!
The children, all nestled so snug in their beds,
Would have nightmares of monsters and skeleton heads.
The moon that hung over the new-fallen snow
Cast an eerie pall over the city below,
And Santa Claus's laughter now sounded like groans,
And the jingling bells like chattering bones.
And what to their wondering eyes should appear,
But a coffin sleigh with skeleton deer.
And a skeletal driver so ugly and sick
They knew in a moment, this can't be St. Nick!
From house to house, with a true sense of joy,
Jack happily issued each present and toy.
From rooftop to rooftop he jumped and he skipped,
Leaving presents that seemed to be straight from a crypt!
Unaware that the world was in panic and fear,
Jack merrily spread his own brand of cheer.

He visited the house of Susie and Dave;
They got a Gumby and Pokey from the grave.
Then on to the home of little Jane Neeman;
She got a baby doll possessed by a demon.
A monstrous train with tentacle tracks,
A ghoulish puppet wielding an ax,
A man eating plant disguised as a wreath,
And a vampire teddy bear with very sharp teeth.

There were screams of terror, but Jack didn't hear it,
He was much too involved with his own Christmas spirit!
Jack finally looked down from his dark, starry frights
And saw the commotion, the noise, and the light.
"Why, they're celebrating, it looks like such fun!
They're thanking me for the good job that I've done."
But what he thought were fireworks meant as goodwill
Were bullets and missiles intended to kill.
Then amidst the barrage of artillery fire,
Jack urged Zero to go higher and higher.
And away they all flew like the storm of a thistle,
Until they were hit by a well guided missile.
And as they fell on the cemetery, way out of sight,
Was heard, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night."

Jack pulled himself up on a large stone cross,
And from there he reviewed his incredible loss.
"I thought I could be Santa, I had such belief"
Jack was confused and filled with great grief.
Not knowing where to turn, he looked toward the sky,
Then he slumped on the grave and he started to cry.
And as Zero and Jack lay crumpled on the ground,
They suddenly heard a familiar sound.

"My dear Jack," said Santa, "I applaud your intent.
I know wreaking such havoc was not what you meant.
And so you are sad and feeling quite blue,
But taking over Christmas was the wrong thing to do.
I hope you realize Halloween's the right place for you.
There's a lot more, Jack, that I'd like to say,
But now I must hurry, for it's almost Christmas day."
Then he jumped in his sleigh, and with a wink of an eye,
He said, "Merry Christmas," and he bid them good bye.

Back home, Jack was sad, but then, like a dream,
Santa brought Christmas to the land of Halloween.

THE END