Yeap, my eggs are viable!

About two years ago, when she was three

She gave a new meaning to my existence.

I deleted my last post because...

Anger can ruin so many things. And even though I feel that I have been wronged, ranting about it just complicates things. Everybody thinks everything is about them and I don't blame them. I feel the same way too sometimes. It's called paranoia.

I've learned that it's awfully wrong to release anger without first finding a target. But then again it's also very wrong to pour my hate at anybody, even if that person really wronged me. In the end what I've really learned is that anger is so wrong.It's wrong to feel it, worse to let it out, and worst to not name names when you rant. People you love and care for get affected right away. Thing is, the person you really wanna kill don't even get it.

So there. I've deleted my post because it made two days of my life a living hell. I did not get away with it. And even if at first I didn't care, I now feel its consequence.

Miscommunication, jumping into conclusions, paranoia... you name it. Human beings are cursed with those since the day they were born. And I'm a human being too.

A friend whom I trust with my life gave me a call and reminded me of something I forgot for a while - that even if 90% of the universe finds it amusing to see you crawl your a$$ out, there are still those who never stop caring. Thank you, Rich.

postscript:
Once again I've proven that my hypothesis is true: I'm disposable. But no harm done. At least I'm aware that I am and I accept the fact with my whole heart. I'm biodegradable too! Better things are coming my way. I'm sure of it.

Fly light

I started this year with this resolution. Yeap, just one this time. To fly light. Not to bring what I dont need. To drop things that would make it "heavier" and harder for me to move in the direction i intend to.

And even though as early as now I've already been smashed to pieces by cruel circumstances, I'm determined to hold on to my resolution much stronger.

Sorry, but I won't be bothered anymore. Even if I get sad and all, it will come to pass. So if you love torturing me, kiss my a$$! You're wasting your time.

Once again I'm turning negative. But this is not a world of positivities. At least not right now. We all have sh*t to deal with. Lucky you, you're holding the lenses that burn the ants.

Fly light. If I don't seem to mind you, it only means that you're one of 'em people who burden me. Congratulations!

Skin Deep

march 06

My pictures, a reflextion of my vanity. Afterall, this is my site.

Who We Are Instead

from J, during his listening party

We started out as just members of the e-group. Our common denominator? - We all love the music of Jars of Clay. Since Jars' concert in Manila a year ago, we've become inseparable.

sad sad song

I stayed home because my throat hurts like hell. My three-month immunized state theory proved to be wrong this time (I got sick in november yata). Anyways, I was in my bed, listening to my mp3s when this certain sad song played. There are only 3 persons in the world I know who know this and one of them caused me to forever feel sad whenever I hear this song. Same person who's the reason why i almost always cry when I listen to Home, from Dishwalla's Opaline album. Anyhoot, here's the lyrics of the song which, just now, made the lump in my throat even bigger. I feel like I'm going to suffocate.


Here I am, There you go
SPLENDER

So now you say dirty things that you regret
Try to breathe and relax and get over it
This I know, this I know.

And now you look and you're digging a deep hole
And every word that you say is regrettable
This I know, this I know.

But here I am
There you go
Time's been changing you more than you'd ever know
Here I am
There you go
Ive been waiting for more than you'd ever know.

You can pretend that you don't need a reason
For all the calls on the phone that would never end
This I know, this I know.
So now you're cold and you're tired and you ask me
Try to wave with the hand as you scratch me
This I know, this I know.

But here I am
There you go
Time's been changing you more than you'd ever know.
Here I am
Letting go
I've been waiting for more than you'd ever know.

We'll last, stay here.
While you're not there
Bear with me, please.
Day after day
I'll get my way
Bear with me.

So now you stare at the face in the photograph
You want to scream but you can't get away with this
This I love, this I love.

But here I am
There you go
Time's been changing you more than you'd ever know
Here I am
I'll let you go
I've been waiting for more than, more than you know.

But I know
But I know
More than you know

Here I am (I know, well I know)
Here I am (I know)